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Surprise! There are no free ponies. Only free pony meat! Mmmm... pony on a stick. Speaking of ponies, this is the worst segue ever into the..... KICKBALL-RELATED JOKE OF THE DAY: A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says, "because you're telling that stupid joke again." Then they became best friends and went to McCarthy Quad to go play kickball, where they had the best time ever. *BUD-DUM PSSHHHH!* KICKBALL-RELATED JOKE OF THE DAY, uh, BONUS EDITION: Rabbi: Knock knock. Priest: Who's there? Rabbi: Guess who. Priest: OH, SNAP! GUESS WHO! I LOVE THAT GAME! Okay, do they have a hat? Rabbi: What? No! Priest: *click click click click*. Do they have... glasses? Rabbi: No. You don't get it. You're not supposed t... Priest: *click click click* OOH! I KNOW! Is it....... Clara? Rabbi: That's it. I quit. *drives off* --FIVE HOURS LATER-- Priest: Pssst. Do they have a.... MUSTACHE? Rabbi: Gaauh! It's three-o-clock in the morning! How the hell did you get in here? Priest: When you were driving off, I used my grappling hook to catch the back of your car, being sure to jump off when we got to the laser-enforced checkpoint outside the fortress. I waded through the moat in my lava-proof suit, and then hid in the Cave of Lost Souls And Stuff, waiting for the guard dogs to go to sleep. Then I knocked out the gardener and stole his keys. Nun: This is the worst joke in the history of the planet. Rabbi: where the hell did you come from? Horse from previous joke: Who cares? Come on, we need three more people on our team! Rabbi and Priest and Nun: OH, SNAP! KICKBALL! I LOVE THAT GAME! Clara: Ooh, can I play too? Nun: No, you have a funny-looking hat. And the punchline is..... Orange you glad I didn't say banana?!!? --Aaron (who is expecting an angry and/or confused letter from Susan Laemmle about this one...) © 2005 Aaron Kositsky & USC Kickball Club. |